I have to admit that the first time I looked at this book, I really didn’t agree with the title. After all, that is what mothers are for—isn’t it?—to make everything all better! Moms are supposed to kiss away owies, break up arguments, explain homework, make sure family member’s clothes match, and in general, “fix things”. I thought I was supposed to make everything all better. Then I started reading and I was in for a shock. I was actually frustrating my loved ones with all my “trying-to-fix-things”!
This insightful book teaches the practical how-to of being an understanding, loving, true friend to your family and associates by learning to empathize, rather than solve problems. By allowing our loved ones to take responsibility for themselves, they are uplifted and empowered. And you will find some peace, Mom. Instead of feeling like you have to control things, or solve others’ problems, or advise anyone—you can learn to be an understanding listener and enable others to find their own solutions. What a brilliant and enlightening concept. A listening ear, not advice, is what blesses our families.
I highly recommend this very practical book that you will put to use the moment you begin reading it. It has made our family life so much better! I have re-read and studied this book for years and still find it new, fresh and very valuable to me. And essential, as is doesn’t come naturally—to me, at least. The principles are simple, but they go against the commonly held beliefs that moms are supposed to give advice, and fix things. I find the principles in this book to be true, to be freeing and to bring joy!
If you are a mom who feels like it is your job to make everyone happy, please everyone at your own expense, and keep everything under control, read this book and learn the best way to serve others! It takes less effort than your old way of responding. And you will discover that others appreciate you more.
This is an excellent crash course in relationship skills. Chapters cover every possible relationship: with spouse, little children, teenagers, grown-up children, aging parents, split families, etc. There is also helpful information on when it is appropriate to give advice or teach someone information they may need, and how to do it so you won’t be seen as meddling.
Isn’t it a relief to realize that we don’t have to make everything all better, Mom? We actually cannot make anything all better. Everyone has to solve their own problems. But you we learn to love and empathize, have compassion and concern, listen and understand—and in so doing, give others a tremendous gift!
Read this book! I know you’ll thank me.
Available at my bookstore: I Don’t Have to Make Everything All Better